er, erm, well, I didn’t really like to ask y’know, so long as folk are havin’ a good time a blink, that’s how quickly a year passes, I must be gettin’ auld :-), quiet in the cheap seats please the end of july already in a year that’s had a wetter summer than a the tropics, ‘cept we don’t get the temperatures to go with it midweek and I’m checking the bbc meteorological website, (I looked up the word meteorological in my hindi/gaelic dictionary, it defines it as ‘a work of fiction’, ‘dreamlike state of untruth’ and, with an alternate inflexion, ‘the wee bits of sticky stuff that gets stuck in yer dog’s trousers after he’s gleefully rolled in a dead sheep’ )sounds about spot on to me. The report said ‘sunny with patchy cloud’…. like they have a clue what they’re talking about, or did they ? see ! the previous wednesday, half a dozen well meaning idiots gather in a pub to finalise plans for the 6th P in The Park, luckily several folk hadn’t made the meeting, lucky?, well it meant the rota sheet for door and security was as virginal as the driven snow, well anything could happen to the weather this summer. Grabbing the pen I bagsied 5-7pm friday on the door, coughing for 6-8am sunday for security, good ‘un. do me four hours and there’d be nothing else to worry about, well, to coin that quaint auld phrase ‘yer baws, ma arse’, cunning plans have a way of coming apart at the seams as easily as those on Mitch’s underpants. There’s always something to fix/get/setup/drink…. friday morning and I’ve got the day off, ok , grab the site lights (moving the jump leads out of the way to get them), cable ties and a bit of knarly string, it’ll come in useful for something. I arrive about midday, Sharon’s already on site, Chris has already dropped off our rally office, surprisingly he didn’t get a pull off the boys in blue considering it’s basically a tow bar connected to a large bag of shite with splinters in, which resembles a caravan only if you squint hard and poke a banana in yer other eye First order of the day was to erect the three marquees in the field, just in time Nodge arrived to drop his carry-out off, he parked the 3.5 tonner (well he had a lot of Koppaberg) and pitched in. The wind was blawin’ but luckily Myles was on hand to act as an anchor, as the marquee insisted on exercising it’s god given right to reach low earth orbit. We decided discretion was the better part of valour and decided to put just the one up, since we only had four ground spikes it seemed the sensible? thing to do. always remember to wear appropriate warm clothing on yer trike now if I look at it from this angle ……………………… Next, a rescue mission, Dinger had nearly made it with his army surplus stall, all the way from Sunderland only to break his accelerator cable 50 yards outside the gate. Gone midday and folk started arriving, no doubt spurred on bay the lack of rain and rare prescence of the big red shiny thing. Nodge returned avec bike and tent, somewhere along the line dropping his kecks and putting a big crack in me camera lens, I can’t for the life of me remember how that nonsense started, what’s new then ? First disaster of the weekend, off we went to get the trusty ‘formula 69’ racing wheelie bins out of the container only to discover that some local scroats had nicked them, leaving only the kiddies one, F**k, to me ages to build them, oh well bigger and better for next year then. Peter revels in having finished the daily record quick crossword Next, a rescue mission, Dinger had nearly made it with his army surplus stall, all the way from Sunderland only to break his accelerator cable 50 yards outside the gate. Gone midday and folk started arriving, no doubt spurred on bay the lack of rain and rare prescence of the big red shiny thing. Nodge returned avec bike and tent, somewhere along the line dropping his kecks and putting a big crack in me camera lens, I can’t for the life of me remember how that nonsense started, what’s new then ? First disaster of the weekend, off we went to get the trusty ‘formula 69’ racing wheelie bins out of the container only to discover that some local scroats had nicked them, leaving only the kiddies one, F**k, to me ages to build them, oh well bigger and better for next year then. 5pm arrives and I’m off to do my stint on the door, everyone’s sitting about outside, 7pm comes and I’m off, wohhooo. Bar ! I even avoided hitting the F3 topbox bar, in order to hone my hosting skills I felt that catching up with mates, mingling, blethering and of course drinking huge quantities of alchohol was the decent thing to do. Threafter the detail of Friday night is to say the least, ambiguous, perhaps even slightly blurry. Watty and his ‘Cavern Rock’ Disco spun out tunes and ‘Shadows of the Sun’ and and chocolate Subway played their live sets. Both young bands we gave a shot at playing their first rally. Unfortunately they called on Wednesday to say they’re PA had broken. Luckily a last minute call secured a PA for the evening Next challenge?, the leccy feed wired from the light pole, ahem, had filled with water and gave up so no light for the marquee. Lucky we had a nice night so we could sit about outside. Saturday, The big red shiny thing, I’ll keep mentioning it coz I haven’t been able to much so far this year, woke me and my hangover early. cheers ! Mr Bouncy Castle arrived with sack fighting pole thingy, all for the weans of course, weans of ANY age as it turned out. Of course I had to test the sack fighting thing, by the time I’d climbed up on it opposing Scooby I realised, or my hangover did, that this was a very, very bad idea. One swing from Scoobs, yup it works, I’m out of here. A few pills and a ‘Desperate Dan’ sized steak pie an chips and I was on the mend. Next Challenge, the first band ‘Whackscallion’ don’t turn up, F**k, no call, no warning !, turns out the drummer had a spat during the day and announced he was leaving and flounced off. The main band of the evening, ‘Bons Balls’ stepped in , they could play two extended sets and fill the time, good lads. I’d seen them at the Rampant Lion Rally but hadn’t really heard them, if ye know what ah mean. They play only Bon Scott period AC/DC, it just so happens that’s the only period of AC/DC I actually like. The guitarist doing his Angus Young bit had only joined the band that day ! and had travelled up from Durham way. I hear lots and lots of rally bands, to be honest I’m sick of hearing many tribute bands, not many hold my attention, Bons Balls did, they played two stonkin’ sets of all my old favourites, gaun yersels’ In between sets there was the Trophies and Tattoo comp, I’m pretty sure Draco’s (the winner’s) tatt’s on the side of his skull must have been just a bit nippy to have done ! the fluffy bunnies competition, this time with TUC biscuits as it was the only thing we could get enough of, was a great laugh, Gordy secreted some water and Davey P was definitely swallowing, professional hater of TUC bscuits Carol from the FVMCC took the trophy. I took pity and didn’t post the highly unflattering photie, That fiver came in handy by the way 🙂 FBPECS qualified ?
Scooby sidled off to return in the full doo regelia, it seems ye put on a dog costume and everybody wants tae hump ye :-). Wee John got it, what with that and a rather nasty misplaced F3 frontal wedgie he didn't know whit end tae hold. 1:30am is just the time to find out that Mr Bouncy castle has left the generator dry, uurgh, where's that siphon hose. 6am and the sun was shinin', no one else was, coz they weren't daft enough, or capable, to get up that early. "Hey Wattmeister, got anythin' by Snoop Doggy Dog"
I'd been blethering with Bloggsy over the weekend, admiring the 1900 twin in his new 'strato or was it road liner ?', it's the US import one, he appears from his tent and proffers me the keys, tak it fur a guid blast man, er, think twice ?, naw, as Jack and Victor philosophy dictates 'he who hingeth aboot gets hee haw'. What a motor, I've spent most of my ridin'/buildin' life running big air cooled fours, my recent sojourn into the world of the missus's 650 dragstar has warmed me to the wiles of the v-twin, the 1900 did nothing but confirm it, you just can't help grin when you open the throttle and the torque kicks you in the pants. Fuggin' brilliant ! I return, offering him a swap, which Bloggsy politely declines, anyone know where I can pick up a xvs1900 motor let me know :-), send some rockin' horse shit too. One of the major benefits for me is that Yamaha have had the sense to leave it air cooled, no radiators to ruin the lines of a chop frame. Last challenge of the weekend is Nodge's Harley which has a flat battery again, this is where picking up, instead of moving those jump leads on friday would have helped, so off to the town to buy a set. Later he found out that the reg/rec is wanked, £204 harley earth pounds !, ouch. So another year done, weather was kind, those sacrificed chickens really did the trick. We might set it up, but folk make a rally, so cheers to all those who came and supported us and partied their socks off, we might even do it again. Words & Pics by Al